


Mistaken

by 123456ja



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Drama, Hurt, M/M, Murder, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-11
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-07-29 10:30:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16262366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/123456ja/pseuds/123456ja
Summary: Yunhyeong claimed a crime he didn't do. It resulted to him gaining an enemy. Kim Hanbin.





	1. The Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Fiction. This story is just a fiction. So, don't take it seriously. I have a hard time writing this so please give it lot's of love. Also, if you're uncomfortable with murder and any form of violence, don't read this because it has lots of it.
> 
> [ usual disclaimer for typos and grammar error ]

.

_Unlike his brother, Song Yunhyeong was deemed useless. He wasn't smart. He wasn't that tall. He was weak. And he always relied to his only family, Song Jinhwan. Given the situation, the young man, twenty at that time, grew up looking up to his brother._

_Jinhwan was like the sun to Yunhyeong. And because Yunhyeong was simple minded, he resigned himself to be of help to his brother, whatever it would be. Even to owning a crime Yunhyeong even didn't do._

 

* * *

 

 

"Hanbin... remember my little brother?" Jinhwan asked as he was removing his lab coat. "He's coming to live with me and Jiwon starting next week."

Kim Hanbin, a producer who was friends with two scientists Song Jinhwan and Kim Jiwon, who were housemates due to their partnership in their research, placed the book he was reading down and eyed the man.

"I see... well you said he offered to help in the household chores and stuff... sounds trivial to me."

"Yaaaaah!" a whiny voice came booming from the producer's main door into the living room. "Don't talk like that to dear Yunhyeongie! I've seen him once and he's a doll!"

"Jiwon... don't run inside the house, you just slipped the other day..." Hanbin grumbled, ruffling the man's black hair before kissing him on the forehead. Yes, Kim Hanbin was having an affair with the beautiful man Kim Jiwon. And Jinhwan knew about it.

"Okay, you two love birds... I'll leave you two for some quality time," Jinhwan announced with a grin. "Thanks for the book Hanbin, I was looking all over fot it. I'm going first. And you Jiwon, go home early, we need to discuss the results of the experiment at home."

"Yes, I know..." Jiwon replied, cuddling comfortably on his lover's lap. "I'll be home by eleven."

 

* * *

 

"You've seen Jinhwan's brother?" Hanbin asked as he played with Jiwon's silky hair with his fingers.

Jiwon looked up and smiled. "Yes... but I am kind of worried you know?"

"Worried...?" the man repeated, the darkness of the night creeping into the living room.

"Well, look," Jiwon started, frowning. "Jinjwan together with me is being scouted by a very popular company...but Yunhyeong isn't an achiever. I bet he's jealous at some point."

For a long while, Hanbin just stayed silent as he pondered things. "It's human nature to feel jealous, siblings, lovers, everyone..." the man gently replied.

"He told me he was jealous of his brother before and even to me jokingly... poor boy... lacking of self-confidence."

Hanbin couldn't care less about this kod. The only important persons in his life were Jiwon, his lover and Jinhwan, his bestfriend.

 

* * *

 

Yunhyeong took out the keys that was sent to him from his pocket, and a chain-less locket fell out of it. The locket opening on its own, revealing a happy picture. Yunhyeong picked it up hurriedly and smiled from the bottom of his heart.

"Finally... I'm here..."

The ticking clock said 9:53 in the evening. Everything was silent as if the whole world became suddenly devoid of the living. Yunhyeong hurriedly removed his shoes and pressed on the lights. And suddenly he dropped his huge bag on the floor with a thud.

The whole place was perfect. But the tense air inside was warning the man that something wasn't right. It was like a calm before the storm in his brother and friend's apartment.

"Hyung?" Yunhyeong called or whispered. The truth was he didn't even know if there was something that came out of his mouth. He was just very worried. Worried for his brother, and for their room mate, Kim Jiwon.

Slowly and without sound, the man who came to Seoul from the outskirts of the city to stay with his brother for good was welcomed with a misfortune.

"What's going..." Yunhyeong walked into the dim hallway and sighed a sigh of relief when he saw from the open door his brother standing, his back facing him.

"Hyung!!! Are you okay? The house wha-"

The moment the brunette entered the room was the time Yunhyeong saw red. Blood. Blood pooling under his brother who was still standing there like a rock.

Heart throbbing, Yunhyeong swallowed hard. The roommate and close friend Jiwon he once saw was there lying on his back. Beautiful like a mannequin, his shiny hair soaking with his own blood.

Yunhyeong could even get a conclusion without head spinning formulas. Kim Jiwon was dead.  
Reaching out his hand to his brother, thinking his brother was injured himself, Yunhyeong once more called. But Jinhwan slowly turned to him. His face, his white lab gown, his hands, were in red. It made the man's face paper white.

"Yunhyeongie... I... I..." Jinhwa stammered, his eyes unfocused. His right hand, still holding the envelope opener streaked with blood. "I didn't mean to..."

The more Yunhyeong stared at his brother, the more he was getting scared. Because he could feel what was coming next. It was creeping, crawling into his skin, suffocating him. And the only word that came out of his mouth was 'why'.

"The research that we've been doing for two years..."the older man murmured as if he was talking to the wall behind Yunhyeong. "It's successful... It's successful. A cure for HIV..."

Nailed on the spot, blown by the huge news, Yunhyeong grabbed the hem of shirt tightly. It would be a discovery the whole world would be thankful of. But still, he wasn't happy. He felt he wanted to puke. The stench of fresh blood filling his nose.

"But Yun...we sort of got a misunderstanding... he... he wanted to keep the patent... but I already talked to a huge foreign company to sell it..."

Yunhyeong couldn't help it. He couldn't breath. He couldn't utter a single word.

"They'd buy it for a very huge sum of money, compared to our local ones, Yun if that happens...WE WOULD NEVER HAVE TO WORK A DAY IN OUR LIVES..."

"What are you saying...?" Yunhyeong whispered.  
Hysterically, Jinhwan dashed towards his younger brother, holding the man on both shoulders. "Believe me... I didn't mean to do this! God, my life is over. All the hardwork... all my dreams... all gone..."

"Hyung..." Yunhyeong mouthed, heart aching so bad. The glowing rays of his brother would be extinguised right before him.

"I don't want to go to jail... I'm sorry Jiwon... I'm sorry..."

Hugging his younger brother, Jinhwan cried like a child.

And then the two froze.

"Jinhwan? Jiwon?" a barritone voice, cool and firm came into their hearing. "I brought food since Jiwon sent me a message you guys haven't eaten yet..."

The distant sound of table wares clanging, both brothers froze. Hanbin knew never to interrupt the research partners in their work room so he just started setting the expensive meal he bought.

Feeling there was a sudden cold water poured over them, both brothers started trembling.  
"Hanbin...." Jinhwan choked. "God... I killed his lover... what do I do?"

Helpless, Yunhyeong just stood there, staring at the pale, yet beautiful face of the man on the floor. He knew Hanbin and Jiwon, because of the messages Jinhwan had sent him. It was like knowing them already by just reading and looking. But that time, Yunhyeong was just numb. He of all people wanted his brother to succeed. He wanted to protect him.

Hanbin glanced at the dim hallway with furrowed brows. Having second thoughts at first, Hanbin left the kitchen and started for the work room of the two. His keys dangling from his dark denim jeans producing a sweet chime that sounded like a dead's tune for the brothers.

"Oi, did the two of you already died from hunger?" Hanbin muttered while walking.  
"Yunhyeong...." Jinhwan gritted, sounding like a strangled animal in a trap. Scared, helpless, hopeless.

As if everything turned gray, Yunhyeong felt light headed. His own clothes stained with blood. His own face has gone paper white.

"It's okay... okay... it's okay... Hyung didn't mean it..." Yunhyeong chanted.

"I killed Jiwon," Yunhyeong whispered to his brother's ear before grabbing the sharp object from his brother's grasp and pushed the man away.

"Unlike me, hyung could do something useful. He could save thousands of lives... Unlike me..."

And like a maniac, the young man started slashing in the air while crying himself.  
"Yunhyeong!!!" Jinhwan yelled. "What are you-"  
Yunhyeong slashed and slashed until he made a long cut on his brother's bicep. He slashed and slashed until Jinhwan became out of balance and fell on top of the late Jiwon. He slashed and slashed as if it could cut back the time and undo everything.

"YUNHYEONG!!!"

Hearing the pained scream, Hanbin's easy steps became huge and fast.

"Jinhwan?!" Hanbin called. And panting, the man stood frozen by the door frame. He was met by reddish, brown eyes staring at him widely. Blood on his clothes and hands. And a conflicted expression. "What on Earth..."

Yunhyeong swallowed a sob and his shaking fingers finally loosened, letting the cutter stained with new blood fall on the floor.

Hanbin's eyes at his wounded bestfriend first and slowly, to his motionless lover on the floor.

"Ji-Jiwon?" Hanbin mouthed. His breath almost leaving him as he slowly approached his lover. "Jiwon?" he called as if it would bring the sweet and intelligent man back to life.

He caught a glimpse of the long cut on his bestfriend's arm before holding Jiwon into his arms. He was so distraught and confused that Hanbin couldn't even shed a tear.

"You're Yunhyeong?" The brother? How can you do this...? To my Jiwon.. and to your brother?!" Hanbin spat.

Throwing a short glance at his confused brother, a glance that meant thousands of thoughts, Yunhyeong bowed his head at Hanbin.

"I didn't mean it..." Yunhyeong whispered as soft as a breath.

Hanbin's head was throbbing with all mixed emotions. And there was one thing he could only derive with as he glared with his most hateful eyes at the man. This innocent looking brunette before him was a murderer.

It made Hanbin's senses jumble and explode. Carefully, gently, respectfully, the man lay his dead lover on the floor and went to the shaking man. Where did that strenght come from? That speed? That force?

The only thing Hanbin knew was he had punched the small figure so hard the body stumbled to the floor. He felt his fist tingle with pain. And heaving he watched the man's face contort in pain, the man's small lips quivering with blood.

Dialling a number into his phone, Hanbin turned to Jinhwan who was caught up with everything.

"Jinhwan" Hanbin whispered, the tears that weren't there started flowing. "Consider. Your. Fucking. Brother. Dead."


	2. Prison Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything in Yunhyeong's life is crashing. What would happen to him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm kind of sad that a lot of my mutuals didn't get their ticket for iKON's concert here in Manila. I can't celebrate bec I feel bad for them.
> 
> Also, the characters here are all OOC. If you're uncomfortable with that. Don't read this story. Violence is also mentioned here, same disclaimer applies.

.

.

It caused an uproar. News, internet, newspapers, words of mouth. That a certain young man killed another and tried to kill his own brother. The object of the crime was smothered by Yunhyeong's finger prints and Jinhwan due to self-defense. Hanbin's witness' statement made the case stronger. But Yunhyeong's confession nailed his coffin shut.

After a stressful whirl of events, he was brought into some privately owned prison after a verdict of life imprisonment. In just a night, Yunhyeong became one of the most hated. All the while, his brother, Jinhwan, who sealed his mouth shut due from his younger brother's wishes became a hero in the medical world.

Two weeks. Two weeks without any contact from anyone, and Yunhyeong just stared at the concrete walls inches thick before him. The room was a box of concrete, so much different than the bars he was expecting. No sound. No movement. No color. Nothing to do. Nothing to live by.

That time, Yunhyeong realized then the meaning of 'time is dragging'. He could go crazy just by sitting at one corner. And he was supposed to stay there his entire lifetime? Seventy years, more or less?

"It's okay... hyung for sure... is what the world needs..." the man cheered himself. Though they were like sand against his tongue.

Yunhyeong sighed and looked at the small table at the corner. Only his clothes were there. And the picture he used to put in the locket in between. It was a picture of him and his brother when they were still young. But what was important for the man was what was at the back of it.

"Hey, someone's here to have a word with you."  
It broke Yunhyeong's train of thoughts and hurriedly, the man looked up at the huge man in uniform who opened the steel door for him.

"Someone?" Yunhyeong repeated but since he last talked two weeks ago, his voice was croaky.  
The bulky man moved aside, revealing a man so familiar to him. Tall, handsome and his face said it all. He abhored Yunhyeong. Kim Hanbin abhored Song Yunhyeong to the pits of hell.

"You may leave."

The sound of the metal door scraping against the concrete hurt Yun's ears. But the man couldn't even flinch. He didn't know whether to stand and greet the other man. Or remain like a demented man in one corner.

"My family owns this place..." Hanbin whispered. His eyes could burn a hole at the man's head. "I could kill you right now and no one would know."

Yunhyeong just cuddled into the corner. Hugging his knees to his chest. His prison clothes bulky. Anyone would feel pity. But not Hanbin.

The older man took more steps closer to the man's mattress. His shoes clicking sharply, bouncing in all the corners of the grave of the living.

"Tell me. Why?"

The man just bit his bottom lip. " _Why_?"

Hanbin sat at the edge of the bed. His chiselled body and tense muscles due to anger very obvious. His jaws clashing as the man remembered something.

_"He told me he was jealous of his brother before and even to me jokingly...poor boy...lacking of self-confidence."_

"Because you're useless?" Hanbin asked without even an expression. His eyes colder than ice.

"Hey...have you gone mute?"

_"I didn't kill him..."_

Yunhyeong wanted for some reason to just sink where he was.

"Why...?" Hanbin repeated. "I SAID WHY?!" he shouted, grabbing the man's face, forcing Yun to have eye contact with him. "Because you're jealous of them?"

 _"I already accepted that I am not as good as hyung long ago...but I've come to know my good points..."_ Yunhyeong thought. 

"WHAT?! ANSWER ME!" the man hissed at the other man's ear. His fingers digging onto Yunhyeong's cheeks.

 _"I can cook...I can clean...and I am good at cheering people on..."_  

The man's lips quivering not from fear but due to something else opened to say no. But Yunhyeong...

"I guess... I don't know, I blacked out..." Yunhyeong replied with a forced smile.

  
A slap almost breaking Yun's neck echoed into the room. And the innocent man's sobs escaped his mouth.

 _"Why then when it's me needing the cheering...No one's by my side?"_  

Hanbin grabbed Yun's collar and pulled the thin man close to him. His hot breath grazing at Yun's skin.

"Bastard... Bring Jiwon back to life!" Hanbin screamed at Yun's face before slapping the man on the other cheek. He slapped him hard and strong. He slapped him with all his might. But it was never enough.

"I didn't mean it..." Yunhyeong muttered through broken sobs. " _He didn't mean it.._."

"You think killing you is enough?" Hanbin's eyes started turning red. He hated this murderer. But there was a small voice inside him who was hurting for the man too. But he was all too absorbed by anger the voice was being drowned away. "I am going to make your life miserable...you don't know what you got yourself into... by crossing ways with me."

Yunhyeong raised his hand and held on to the arm almost choking him. He couldn't almost see past the hot liquid in his eyes. But he had only one plea.

" _Forgive me...forgive him...if he realizes it's his bestfriend who did that... Hanbin-shi would get hurt more._.."

Hanbin threw the man against the wall. And Yunhyeong scrambled on the corner once more.

Shaking, trembling, crying, bleeding.

Running his huge hand over his face, Hanbin heaved a deep breath.

"Save your apologies. They mean nothing. I'd be glad to see you die slowly..."

Yunhyeong clasped his hands over his mouth. If he didn't do that, he might scream his lungs out from the pain. His body and face were aching so bad. But the most was his heart. That beating organ who seemed to be shredded to into pieces each time Hanbin glares at him. It was more painful than all physical pains he was feeling.

"I'm sorry..."

Hanbin turned to the door. "Jiwon had four stabs on the chest...I'll let you experience how painful each was."

Hanbin went out, the locking sound of the metal door from the outside sounding much stronger.  
The man ran towards the table to grab something to wipe his sweat and tears off. Pulling the small towel, the photo he treasure for a long time fell on the floor gracefully. He was ten then and his brother was 15. With aching joints, he picked it up and turned it to the other side.

" _I've liked him three years ago...when one day hyung started mailing me all their photos and random stuff about his life in Seoul.._."

Yunhyeong's eyes clouded once more as a smiling face of Hanbin came to view. A small picture he printed out and pasted at the back of his and brother's picture.

" _Jinhwan hyung told me all sorts of things about Jiwon-shi and Hanbin-shi... all their wants... their personalities... and somehow... Hanbin drew me near... I know it is impossible..especially when he has Jiwon-shi by his side_..."

His tears were the only witnesses for his unrequitted love.

" _I was so happy to come to the city because I will be able to see him and mingle with him. Even with just those things, I am fine and content... but this accident has to happen._.."

And Yunhyeong curled up in a small ball where he was. Crying silently as he was touching his swollen and painful face. Imagining a more happy and warm first meeting with Hanbin.

"How can I fall in love with just looking at his picture... crazy... I'm crazy..." he muttered gritting his teeth. "And now... I am hated."

 

* * *

 

 

Protect his brother. A plausible yet insane way of brotherly love by Yunhyeong.

Breakfast, lunch, dinner, it was all the same to Yunhyeong. Days, nights, they were but a long and distant memory. The only thing to look forward to was the handsome man 'visiting' him.

Hanbin wouldn't do anything when he was sobber. He'd just stare at Yunhyeong with eyes enough to tear at the man's flesh. But when he's drunk, he'd turn into a fiend.

" _He really, really loves Jiwon-sh_ i" Yunhyeong thought as he stared at the meal before him.  
In a row of all convicts, Yun seemed to be the youngest. No one would talk to him. It was 'mind your fucking business'. Until an old man, his hair thinnning on top took the empty seat before Yunhyeong.

"You're all beaten up every week young man," the old man commented. "You can just call me 'grandpa'."

Yunhyeong's eyes wandered from his untouched tray of food to the stranger. The man's skin was pale and sagging. His body had turned into a small, bony and rigid form. His face full of wrinkles, and his sad gray eyes were smiling and at was all enough to stir Yunhyeong inside.

"Grandpa..." Yunhyeong mumbled as the old man check the brunette's young yet swollen face. "I... I am S-song... Yun... hyeong..."

The clanging of other utensils seemed faraway as the two at the far end corner of the dining hall looked into each other's faces.

"People are blind, aren't they?"

"My eyes know a murderer..." the old man whispered like in a fairytale. "What are you doing here?"

Something was pulling at Yun's tongue, he only gasped.

Grandpa sighed, his tired face painting a burdened look. "Long ago... I was framed. Perhaps you weren't born yet... I was twenty-three, sentenced to ninety years. It's basically a life imprisonment in its own way," he continued. "Are they expecting me to live until 113 years?" he laughed.

The brunette, gaining more attention from his hiccups started counting with his fingers. "There was a person who lived up to 115... grandpa... if you hang on, you'll be able to go out."

The old man smiled. A smile that brightened up his old face. " You remind me of Spring you know" he sighed.

"Thank you. It's not too late for you as well...I can feel it."

The time for the meal has ended as the bell filled the area. Yun and the old man weren't able to eat but both seemed satisfied for some reason.

"Grandpa..." Yunhyeong called as the old man stood from his seat. "Can... can we talk again tomorrow?"

"Hang on to your hope, kid."

 

* * *

 

 

At the break of dawn, Yunhyeong lost all his will. Grandpa died in his own cell. A peaceful death at the age of 109.

Face buried on his knees, Yunhyeong didn't care anymore about the sound of the familiar door scraping against the floor. He didn't look up at the sound of familiar footsteps. And he didn't look up at the familiar stench of alcohol that filled his living grave.

Yunhyeong thought he could carry it out... turned out, he wasn't strong enough to take one's responsibility on his small shoulders.

"Aren't you going to say hi?"

The brunette who lost all his appetite the entire day pretended he did not hear anything. He just rocked himself back and fort, back and fort like a broken doll. Crying for Grandpa. Crying for his brother. Crying for Hanbin. Crying for himself.

"It's supposed to be Jiwon's birthday today...you know that?" Hanbin's unsteady words got closer and closer. "We were so looking forward to it..."

" _Grandpa... only four more years... me... why is this not enough... why torture me like this...?"  Yunhyeong whispered hurriedly not listening to Hanbin. "What would you do... if... if_..."

"What?" Hanbin hissed.

His eyes turned into slits, grabbing Yunhyeong's wrist in the air. He was a little taken aback by the stare he got from Yunhyeong.

Lips trembling, flushed face, small body, messy hair... was this murderer always like this? So alluring that Hanbin wanted to make him cry even more. Was Song Yunhyeong always this vulnerable he wanted to force himself on him so suddenly? Or was it because his head was swimming with booze?

Yeah, his anger and booze combined together turning into just lust.

Shocked, Yunhyeong had no time to react after being grabbed by the hair. His back slammed against the wall. So strong to knock his breath away for a few seconds.

It was the first time, more than seeing a dead body Yunhyeong felt his skin crawling. Hanbin's eyes weren't the same as they glared hard on him. He pushed and pushed. He struggled. Yet it didn't seem to matter.

"Did you think you can escape? Didn't I say I'd make you miserable?" Hanbin whispered. His breath smelling of alcohol, and smoke.

"No.. No..."

Was his prison shirt made of paper? Yunhyeong wondered as he watched them got torn away by Hanbin's hands.

"Plea-se..." Yun begged, still pushing Hanbin away.

But Hanbin wasn't him anymore. He was just any other drunkard lost in memories.

As Hanbin's fingers bore deep into Yun's arms, the captive could just shake his head hastily.

A strangled moan escaped Yun's mouth when Hanbin bit his ear. A moan no one could hear, see and even realize but the four corners of his cellar.

"I don't want this..." Yunhyeong begged. "I don't wan-"

As if Yun's chant just threw a stoke into the fire, the lost man forced his mouth on Yun, shutting him up.

Muffled voice. Sucking sound. Hurried movements. Yun felt lightheaded. His knees were starting to fail him. He started going on with the flow. When with just a simple word, Yunhyeong broke from a bitter-sweet dream.

"Jii-won..." Hanbin whispered into Yun's lips.  
That hurt Yunhyeong. Hurt him so much that suddenly he got his strenght back and for the first time, got to slap someone so hard on the face his palm felt hot.

Hanbin was taken aback. Licking the corner of his lips that tasted salty.

"Why are you-" Yun breathed in, getting his support to remain standing from the wall.

"Why isn't this enough Hanbin?!" Yun shouted.

"What would you do if it wasn't me!? WOULD YOU DO THIS TO MY BR-"

Yunhyeong bit his tongue to stop himself. Suddenly his angry face turned sad. Like the crying he did still wasn't enough.

Hanbin for some reason stepped back. And as if there was a magnet pulling him deeper into Yun's eyes, he stood frozen on the spot. The alcohol washing away, Yunhyeong's desperate face became clearer. Everything in that gray room became foggy, the only thing engraving in his eyes were Yun's brown ones.

"I'VE LIKED YOU FOR SUCH A VERY LONG TIME AND THIS STUPID ME IS CRAZY ENOUGH NOT TO FEEL ANY ANGER TOWARDS YOU DESPITE THIS!"

A long deafening silence filled the cell. Heavy breathing from Hanbin, broken sobs from Yunhyeong. It was a sound comparable perhaps to hell. Full of suffering and heaviness but no one has the ability but to keep on sinking even deeper.

" _Like?_ "

Hanbin blinked a couple of times. His head registering what he just did. Hurting the man physically, but trying to rape him? A streak of sweat ran down from Hanbin's forehead down to his nape as he watched the man's naked upper body and bruised arms.

This abuse of power... since when did he turn like this?

Yun swallowed hard and stepped towards Hanbin. Reaching out to the Hanbin's conflicted face, his shaking fingers cupped the older man's face. It was barely a touch.

"Jiwon-shi, isn't the only person in the world who loves you..." Yunhyeong whispered, smiling sadly.

"What the hell... are you saying?" Hanbin whispered back. Suddenly he slapped the hands away and turned for the door.

For some reason, Hanbin turned to look back at Yunhyeong. The older man felt like crying himself.

"I'm sorry..." Hanbin mouthed out of nowhere.

" _Sorry because he hurts me? Sorry because he couldn't return my feelings? Both?_ " were Yunhyeong's thoughts as he watched Hanbin's pained face looking at him.

"I didn't want to try... assaulting you"

The door opened and closed. The slamming sound echoing through the night signalled something.

The thick wall growing even thicker. An end to endings.

And since that night, no Kim Hanbin came for that door.

 


	3. Cry Me A River

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can they overcome everything that had happened to them?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I recently watched Reese Witherspoon's movie 'Just Like Heaven' and got the inspiration there.
> 
> [ usual disclaimer formy typos and shitty grammar ]

The sound of irritated writing against paper echoed into his room. He couldn't type anything. So deciding to try writing with a pen and paper, Kim Hanbin tried to build up a story for the song he is making.

But no idea was coming into him. Just a freaking confession that kept on ringing into his ear like a ghost that was following him everywhere.

"Bullshit..." he cursed, throwing his pen against the wall.

He stood from his swivel chair and stood before the window overlooking the innocent, peaceful looking city which under its facade, was concealing more secrets.

_"Jiwon-shi, isn't the only person in the world who loves you..."_

Has it been a month and a half since he last visited that cell? Since that night when he almost raped Song Yunhyeong, he couldn't even force himself to go near that place.

_"How can he like me? We never even met," he exhaled while his brows were in a deep frown. "I don't care anymore..."_

As the man stared at the night view of the city below him, the reflection of his window mirror changed. A face of someone else taking form. At first he thought it was Jiwon. But it was Yunhyeong's.

Hanbin huffed. All that making Jiwon's murderer suffer had etched the man's memory in his head. He wanted to scratch it away, but the more he shoo them, the more they engrave in his brain.

Now that he was out of his insane trance of Jiwon's death...he realized, he was crazy himself.

_"Serve the sentence like one should..." he exhaled. "I've been overboard as well..."_

Just as he was about ready to erase Yunhyeong's memories and pretend the young man to be dead like he initially thought he'd do, his doorbell rang.

It rang and rang and rang.

The shrill sound almost irritating him.

Hanbi npeeked into the peephole and surprised, he opened the door abruptly.

Jinhwan threw himself at Hanbin's feet. Touching the man's legs, clinging tightly into Hanbin's flesh.

Hanbin was taken aback. "Jinhwan? What are you doing?" he asked as he tried to get away from his bestfriend.

"Hanbin... please... kill me... kill me!"

Getting confused by the moment, Hanbin bended and picked his bestfriend up. That was the time he noticed the deep circles under the man's eyes. The weight that was lost. The pale complexion. The burdened look. Jinhwan seemed like ten years older than his real age.

"Hanbin... I am begging you..." Jinhwan whispered in his hoarse voice. He wanted to cry but he already was out of tears. "Kill me..."

All the blabbering started reaching into Hanbin's head, his chest sensing something was definitely wrong.

"Jinhwan... I don't understand you!" the man shouted, shaking the other man heavily.

Jinhwan grabbed Hanbin by the shoulders. His fingers digging hard.

"It was all for money and fame... I thought I'd be happy... my talent... everything..." Jinhwan muttered hurriedly, brokenly, shakingly.

"But my brother... my brother... it's too late to realize that all these fame and material things I acquired is nothing without him... let go of him please?"

Hanbin sighed as he walked away from Jinhwan, _"Brother's desperation to protect his younger brother?_ "

The one being asked looked into Jinhwan's unkept form. His eyes getting a glimpse of the centipede-like stitches he got from his injury that fateful night.

Raising a brow, Hanbin looked the other way. "That's impossible. Setting aside Jiwon... your brother still killed a human. There's no escaping that."

Jinhwan bowed down on the floor. Shaking and like a crazy man sobbed. It was the first time Hanbin saw the man so... uncomposed.

"My brother is innocent..." a muffled voice escape Jinhwan.

Slowly, Hanbin turned to look at the begging man before him. His face blank.

Jinhwan looked up. "Yunhyeong is innocent... Hanbin... my brother didn't do anything..."

"Jinhwan... wha-"

"I KILLED JIWON!" Jinhwan blurted. "I WAS THE ONE WHO KILLED HIM BECAUSE OF OUR RESEARCH!"

Jinhwan started crawling towards Hanbin.

"Y-Yunhyeong just arrived that night. He saw me... and took the crime for himself because I was greedy! God... HANIBIN...RELEASE HIM... YOUR FAMILY OWNS THAT PLACE RIGHT? I'M WILLING TO PAY WHAT HAS TO BE PAID... THROW ME IN INSTEAD! BUT PLEASE... IF MY BROTHER DIES... I'D DIE!"

Almost kissing the floor, Jinhwan once more begged before his bestfriend.

"Hanbin... I'm serious... Yunhyeong just did those things for show... my career was just starting off... and he's always been a kid like that... taking everything for himself even if it matters sacrificing himself... Hanbin..."

Hanbin's hands fell on his side. He wasn't able to hear anything anymore but that one part. "'If... if your brother dies'?"

"The cell guard... gave me a message that Yunhyeong is seriously ill..."

The words didn't sound like it was even believable. For all the strenght in Hanbin vanished as he fell seated on the center table horrified. Hanbin didn't even know what was going on anymore.

Hanbin clasped his hand over his mouth. "Oh my god..."

_"I could kill you right now and no one would know."_

_"I am going to make your life miserable...you don't know what you got yourself into...by crossing ways with me."_

_"Why isn't this enough Hanbin-shi?! What would you do if it wasn't me!? WOULD YOU DO THIS TO MY BR-"_

_"I'VE LIKED YOU FOR SUCH A VERY LONG TIME AND THIS STUPID ME IS CRAZY ENOUGH NOT TO FEEL ANY ANGER TOWARDS YOU DESPITE THIS!"_

_"Jiwon-shi, isn't the only person in the world who loves you..."_

"Oh my god..." Hanbin stood unsteadily and dashed out of his flat not even locking it.

* * *

His car made loud screeching sound as he drove through the middle of the night. The dark streets, the silence, the glaring taillights of the car before him as the traffic sign turned red. It was all eating away at Hanbin's flesh his grip on the stirring wheel got tighter and tighter.

"Fuck... FUCK!"

Hanbin pressed on that horn button a number of times. And when he couldn't hold it anymore, he let out a yell. A yell from the pits of his stomach it grazed against his throat.

His voice echoed and disappeared into thin air. And huffing, Hanbin slammed his forehead against the stirring wheel. His lips only visible from under, his teeth digging into his bottom lip as he suppressed a shameful cry.

He wasn't allowed to cry and beg for anything. Why was he so afraid so suddenly? Conscience? No. Fear? No.

* * *

It was something unnamed yet deeper.

It seemed like a maze. A long maze where one could easily get lost.

Hanbin ran. His feet carrying him so fast like a wind. His hair flying to the side. His face ashen.

Each time he thought he'd reach the medical facility of the prison privately owned which his family runs, it seemed like it just gets farther and farther away.

He made a shortcut, running past a number of cells. And for some reason he halted. The familiar door he used to open was there before him.

Hanbin, huffing, swallowed hard as the cellguard emerged from the door, holding what seemed like meager belonging's into his arms.

"What are you doing?" Hanbin asked.

"Ah sir..." the bulky man looked down on his arms and back to Hanbin. "Yunhyeong-shi's stuff. It seemed like he wouldn't make it... so I'm cleaning up-"

For no reason at all, Hanbin grabbed them off from the bulky man's hands.

Hanbin couldn't even get mad at that time. Something was loudly buzzing in his ears that he left the other guy and continued with his run. He didn't even feel so much conflicted like this when Jiwon died. Why now? Why now?!

The moment he saw the huge sliding doors to the medical facility, his fast steps became slower. As if he was having second thoughts of going in.

Cautiously, breathing deeply and heavily, he pressed onto the door, pushing it and suddenly, the white lights, the white floors and the white walls that were nothing short of a hospital stung his eyes after all those gray darkness.

Before he could continue, something fell from what he was carrying. Like a two by two ID picture contrasted on the spotless white, tiled floors.

He picked it up and grunted as he saw a young Jinhwan and very much younger Yunhyeong grinning at the camera. They wore smiles so bright it was hard to believe the situation they were in suddenly.

He decided to tuck it in his pocket, but then brought it back to his face.

For when he flipped it over, it was a picture of himself three years younger.

Hanbin almost lost his balance and he grabbed on to the walls for support. His breathing thick and his throat felt like something was about to explode inside it.

The man ran his hand over his forehead, pausing over his eyes. "What have I done..."

A few more seconds passed before he was able to drag his feet once more. Leaving his spot, the floor where he stood briefly had some spots. Like small droplets of rain, they shone under the bright lights.

* * *

He did saw unfamiliar faces looking at him. Perhaps he looked sick himself. Hanbin was wearing an ID classified as one of the people running the entire place, so they just stared with confused looks.

And then he froze.

A nurse who just pushed open a smaller door revealed a color he wouldn't mistake for anyone else. That small figure on a white bed could never be any one else.

He gulped as he dragged himself towards the door.

He just entered unannounced. His gaze not leaving the pale face on the bed. Yunhyeong was as white as the bedsheet.

"W-what's his condition?" he asked not looking at the doctor.

The man in white pushed his glasses on the bridge of his nose not too much surprised that this man was there.

"He's very much dehydrated... hey what's the current temperature?" the doctor suddenly turned to his nurse.

"42 degrees doc..."

Turning back at Hanbin as if he was just announcing the weather, he continued. "His fever won't go down and reached that point. If this continues, it might result into irrepairable brain damages or internal organ damages. Or death."

"Can't you do anything?!" Hanbin hissed at the doctor's face.

Calmly to the point that it was irritating, the doctor sighed. "I already did everything I am supposed to do. It's all up to his determination now."

Hearing that, Hanbin was rendered speechless as he watched the motionless, thin and lifeless body on the bed. The only sign of Yunhyeong still being alive was his heavy and raspy breathing filling the room.

Minutes passed and hours went by and still Hanbin was just standing there. He hasn't moved an inch from the spot where he appeared before. And like him, Jinhwan, crying helplessly for his brother was also there.

Surprisingly, Hanbin couldn't even muster the strenght to get angry over Jinhwan at the time. He was just...worried. Nothing else.

As the night went deeper and the silence grew louder, Hanbin for some reason looked to the open door. He looked because he saw someone pass by. Brunette, thin and wearing white.

Hanbin threw a look at the body on the bed for a few seconds before running out of the room. Making Jinhwan and the nurses on standby look at each other's faces confusedly.

The man ran, his hair and shirt disheveled. His judgement and everything was clouded because of anger that he wasn't even able to see things through. He was more foul than a murderer. And now...he was one big messed up man.

He didn't know if his brain was making up things. He didn't believe in spirits or anything related. But what could he do when he was so sure that was Yunhyeong. He was sure of it. That boy walking away from that spot was Yunhyeong.

"Yun-hyeong..."

The man turned. He looked so healthy. Bright and gentle. The Yunhyeong he never got to see.

Surprisingly, Hanbin didn't feel any fear... he just knew that if he didn't stop this Yunhyeong before him from going away, the one laying on the bed, 50:50 would also vanish too.

"No... ah... I'm sorry... I... God... I didn't know anymore..." Hanbin almost begged. "P-please don't go... please don't die...?"

The Yunhyeong figure just smiled. He continued walking away, until before Hanbin's eyes he vanished.

Dumbfounded, Hanbin stared into air.  
Until the silence was broken by Jinhwan's shouts and cries.

From where he was, he could here it clearly. Hanbin could hear it very clearly it rang deep into his skull.

**"YUNHYEONG! YUNHYEONG! NO, NO NO!"**

Slowly turning to the room he came from, Hanbin then dashed to the place where the scream was coming from. Nurses and the doctor looking after Yunhyeong was gathered around the fragile form. Hanbin couldn't see past them.

Jinhwan's sobs sent shivers down Hanbin's spine. Every fiber of his cell tensing. His very core experiencing utter fear.

When all the commotion ended, they stepped away from Yunhyeong's bed. The silence and the sullen appearance on their faces were enough to draw conclusions.

"I'm sorry," the feared words from a doctor seemed to vibrate endlessly into Jinhwan and Hanbin. It made the reality sink in.

"Sorry?" Hanbin repeated.

Jinhwan went to his brother. Asking, begging, crying all at the same time that no one could already understand what he was saying. To everyone's surprise, Jinhwan, hysterical, fainted.

"This is real?" Hanbin asked. He couldn't hear anything from the nurses who rushed to Jinhwan anymore as he walked close to the bed. He stood there, cold and weak. "Isn't this the same as me killing you?"

Hanbi placed his hand over the boy's nose and mouth, feeling for any breathing but there was none.

"Wake up," Hanbin whispered. "Please... I know already... I know it already..."

The long fingers of the man traveled from Yunhyeong's still warm forehead to his cheek. To the man's neck to the man's arm down to the man's hand.

"I haven't had a proper apology to everything I did, there are still a lot of making up for me to do... don't do this..."

The closed eyes, shining from tears left unshed. The half-open mouth, chapped and pale made Hanbin grit his teeth.

To everyone's surprise, for a man exuding so much tense air around him like any royalty, his tears started running down his cheeks. Call it self redemption, being haunted by conscience or whatever, Hanbin was begging all the gods there was for the first time in his heart.

"Yunhyeong... let me make up for my mistakes... I swear I'll do anything. If you tell me to die, I'd do it. Just..." Hanbin whispered while brushing his fingers into the wet mop brown hair.

Hanbin collapsed on the side of the bed, buring his face on the boy's chest. Not caring about everyone in the room, and broke down.

"Just come back. Just come back to me..."

No one aside from Jinhwan and Hanbin knew the story behind why there were being like that. But they all felt sorry for the man trembling over a lifeless body.

Sobbing he never did in his entire life, Hanbin stayed there like a child. A child hoping for something so impossible but still so much clinging into.

Hanbin cleared his throat, ignoring the ticklish sensation on top of his head he thought was just a breeze.

But the gentle sensation againts his hair so focused only on one spot couldn't be just a breeze.

He looked up slowly with his blurry eyes. It was a hand, fingers brushing into his hair. Fingers that came from the man before him.

The people in the room gasped. Some couldn't believe it. Some uttered a small prayer.

The man has beed dead practically for nine minutes. This wasn't short of a miracle. That loss of oxygen into the brain could cause severe complications. But there he was, moving still weakly, yet alive.

"Yun.. Yunhyeong..." Hanbin whispered hoarsely.  
Eyes halfclosed, Yun opened his mouth.

"W-water..."

Breaking out in more tears that wasn't so him, Hanbin pulled the thin form into his arms and hugged him.

"I'm sorry... God... I'm sorry" Hanbin repeated and repeated those words.

Yunhyeong just ran his weak hand over Hanbin's back. As if saying "It's okay".

The man who just crossed the after life and went back burried his face on Hanbin's neck. His words were so soft like just a passing breeze that tickled Hanbin's skin.

"I told you... I can't get mad at you..."

* * *

It seemed like everything was just a dream. All the things they went through. All the realizations of how fragile a human heart and mind was, they all swirled into a grim yet bitter-sweet memory.

Jinhwa , who named all his belongings from the medicine discovery to Yunhyeong, his brother surrendereed himself to the police instead. Taking the responsibility he should have done so from the very start.

"Don't cry Yunhyeong..." Jinhwa whispered, brushing his brother's tears gently with his thumb after the verdict has been delievered. "I didn't mean it...but a human action has it's consequences. That's how the world revolves..."

"Hyung..."

"Hanbin may be hating me now... but he promised me he'd look after you until you can stand in your own feet... he'd take care of you... I'm sure."

"Don't say it like we won't be seeing anymore!"

The brother smiled at the younger one, his face so much better that he finally was able to let out the burden he tried to keep inside him.

"Have I ever said that you are my sun, Yunhyeong? You're worth more than you think... have more self-confidence."

* * *

It was silent and calming. The breeze brushing against Hanbin's cheeks. He had rolled the car windows down and was enjoying the view from an uphill. He just came from hearing and wanted to ease the crying of the little brother that was left, he brought him to a drive.

But Yunhyeong fell asleep on the way.

Since when did he feel this peaceful, Hanbin wondered.

The greenery before him, the small figures moving from far away, they all suddenly felt so precious to him.

Strectching a little, Hanbin then turned to the seat beside him. He watched the soft strands of brown dance over the brunette's face. He just realized it until now that when Yunhyeong's eyes were closed or looking down, his eyelashes that were so long were casting playful shadows over his cheeks.

Hanbin reached out to brush tye man's cheek slightly. He almost lost another precious being. That feeling of relief... what was that?

He removed his dark blue coat and tugged them gently over the sleeping form's body before looking out once more at the sky.

* * *

_"Jiwon... I'm letting go now.. I've found someone to pour my attention to. The two of you isn't comparable and you're always a part of me...but there's one similar thing between you two. He saves lives in his own way. He tried to save his brother. And he also saved me in other ways..._  
_I don't deserve him. But I've come to harbor strong feelings I don't have yet the courage to call 'love'. Right now...I just want to pay everything. Cherish him, protect him and take care of him._

_Jiwon... I realized love is the root of all evil. It made me show something I didn't even know I have. But it is also the root of all goodness. At least that's how Yunhyeong showed me."_  
  
Hanbin threw a glance at the person on his passenger seat.  
  
_"The heart I thought would never beat again when you died started beating once more here in my chest._

_I think you'd understand this of all people and you'd support me._

_I guess this the end for us._

_Goodbye."_

* * *

 

Never be late in realizing the worth of that someone special who loves you. You never know when that person will be gone from your life sometimes forever. The only thought that will bother you, for the rest of your life will be "If Only..." -anonymous

* * *

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story turns out weird, no? Hahaha. I'm sorry if it didn't reach your expectations. My brain is spacing out most of the time because of day dreaming for when iKON comes here in the PH.


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